The Destination Is Only The Beginning Of The Journey!

I thought I would try something different. I wanted to post some thoughts on marriage and relationships but as I began typing my meaning felt hollow and empty on the screen. Having been on radio as a DJ and now doing the same at weddings, I have been told I have a good voice so I thought why not use it…besides who has time to read anyway, So I recorded my thoughts to soundcloud  in my first (of hopefully many) podcast and you will find them below. If this is something you like let me know in a comment and if it is not let me know that too. I do this blog for you not just for me.

Click the play button in the upper left hand corner of the link below to hear it....enjoy.

What is A Friend Nowadays?

I remember growing up when I had a best friend named Peter. We met when he moved in across the street from our house and we formed a lasting friendship that has survived over the past 30 some odd years in spite of the fact that we no longer live across the street but rather three states away now. We always try to catch up when our busy schedules allow but alas because of the time and distance between us we have long had to surrender the true title of best friendship. In fact if I must be honest I can say that we know each other but sadly I could not even tell you the names of his kids at this point.

For the past 7 years I have had new best friend and this time it is a woman. I can honestly say without fear of contradiction that she knows me better than I know myself, and I know even more about her. There isn’t a day that goes by when I don’t talk to her about this or that, and no matter how bad I may feel even a hello from her makes me smile even if she doesn't read my blog lol.

But what is a friend anyway?

It seems with the advent of social media that the word friend has become severely diluted. Lost are the meanings and nuances that set  a person apart from the rest because that person is your friend. It seems that now just because you met a person whether online or in person and had even the briefest of conversations with them we are quick to slap the seemingly arbitrary title of friend on that person. “Hey I met so and so today and we are friends!”. I personally can count on one hand with fingers left over the number of people in my life that i can truly cherish as a real friend.

To most a friend is a person you call when you need a hand moving, or when you need to borrow a tool or some money but heaven forbid you should actually want to spend time with him or her. Worse there are those that will say boldly that they have so many friends as if it is a status symbol, but when you really need a helping hand or a financial rescue they scatter like cockroaches when the lights are turned on.

The term best friend has taken a severe hit as well. It used to be that your best friend was that one and only person you confided all of your trust in. It was the person who knew you better than anyone. The person that if you were lucky knew you better than you knew yourself. Now people will say they have many best friends. A best guy friend and a best girl friend are very common today.

To quote Elbert Hubbard: “A friend is someone who knows all about you and loves you just the same”

How can you possibly know all about someone if you only know them in a text message, an occasional phone call, or on Facebook? I long for a day when this is realized and the word friend can hold the meaning it once did. Oh well what doesn't kill you makes you stronger...except bears. Bears will freakin kill you!

For more on what I do be sure to check out my website at http://www.crystalmagicdj.com

The amateur Incursion

I have been in the wedding business a long time and I have seen vendors come and go. What I find really disturbing is the number of amateur "professionals" that have been cropping up like weeds as of late and it is primarily because of sites like craigslist. Now don't get me wrong craigslist is great if you are looking for someone to mow the lawn twice a month or fix that sink that just wont stop dripping but do you really want to trust your wedding day to these "professionals"?

Take photography for example. It seems like every housewife that gets a Canon Rebel for Christmas suddenly thinks they can be a photographer at a wedding just because they shot their cousin's wedding once and the pictures came out "great". Do you really want to trust those precious once in a lifetime moments to someone that got lucky once because he or she knew everyone at the wedding? My seven year old can get "great" shots on my Nikon at a family get together because everyone is willing to pose for him. Throw that same seven year old into a crowded room where he knows no one and watch him freak the hell out! Now I am not slamming my competition by any means as there are some fine photographers out there, (having been one myself) and I can recommend some talented individuals but honestly I am tired of having to tell a photographer what shots to get because they are shooting what they believe is a "really cool" shot of the bouquet sitting on the table during the cake cutting!

I am in the DJ business and as a lark I went on craigslist to see what my "competition" was up to and I was appalled! I found so many DJs that while they may do well in a nightclub or frat party, had no business advertising themselves as a wedding DJ. I saw prices as low as 30 dollars an hour! That is awesome! Great deal right?

You get what you pay for and if all that matters is someone playing music that is not edited (i.e. non radio-friendly explicit versions that will make grandma have a heart attack and little 11 year old Susie twerk on the dance floor with her "fun" aunt) then that might be perfect for you but if you want a DJ that can announce and coordinate the party so it runs perfectly with appropriate music, then you may have to set your sights a bit higher. Your DJ should not be the most intoxicated person at your wedding reception which is why I never drink on the job!

There have always been amateurs that have tried to pawn themselves off as pros, and we all have that cousin, uncle, brother what have you that knows a lot about cars (computers, medicine, carpentry, etc) but please for the love of all that is holy DO NOT hire someone just because they are cheap especially on the biggest day of your lives!

Please be sure to check out my website at www.crystalmagicdj.com and even if you don't hire me, please call me and at least let me give you the tools you need to pick the right vendors for the job. I will be glad to arm you with the right questions to ask any given vendor and may even be able to recommend a few I have worked with over the years because the amateur incursion is coming!